Off Kilter

So, despite my concerted effort to get to bed earlier - which is working, btw, I am still so tired during the day. I can't understand why either, I am really eating lots of fruits and veggies and whole grain, complex carb type stuff, and drinking water (not soda, etc) and taking my vitamins/supplements. So I am fueling up with all the right stuff.

Maybe it is because my little angel somehow reverted back to her pre-DST times, even though we had gradually moved things up an hour earlier. Sunday worked fine, with all the times appropriate, be it an hour later. However, somehow on Monday, we are back to "normal". Crazy. Something totally mental to me about waking up in the 6 o'clock hour vs 7 o'clock. I am NOT a morning person.

Or just maybe it is because I haven't been to the gym in over a week. Please please someone explain to me why when exercise feels so good, and you feel so good for doing it, that you can't keep it up? Especially when my gym has free childcare and it is an opportunity not only to do something great for myself, but I get to sit in the hot tub and shower unaccompanied! WTF, man?

And then when I do get opportunities during the day, it is like the internet has some strange, yet very powerful, magnetic pull over me and all time ceases to exist. (read: NOTHING ELSE GETS DONE!) Amazing how I can piss away time, and then come the evening, am too damn tired to do anything else.

Yes she crawls and I must constantly chase/redirect her from danger. Yes, we have at least one activity a day. Yes I prepare all the meals. But someone please explain to me, why, when I put her in bed by 7 pm, do I feel I am off duty for everything. And then I STILL can't get to bed at a decent hour?

Sorry I am lamenting. But while I'm at it, I am in two challenges right now in which I am doing only marginal. I need to step it up a notch and just do-it, but sometimes I just don't feel like it! I am going to keep plugging along and then on Monday, all this whining and self-pity is coming to a stop and I am returning to the gym. My goal is 3 days a week. In fact, I am going to post my goals on here to keep me accountable to the 1 (or maybe 2 or 3) readers of this blog - ha ha!