Dude!

I found this (not this particular guy, but one just like it) in my bathroom as my daughter was about a foot away barefoot! OMG, I almost jumped out of my skin. It was almost as big as my thumb, I swear to god. I smashed him up in some washcloths and balled them up and put them in a baggie (sealed, of course) for good measure. When Eric got home I told him about it and he went to check it out. He came laughing, for the bulbous body must have ruptured, leaving only the shriveled up mess of bright red legs and fangs. Not very formidable at all like that. Seriously, it scared the crap out of me. Turns out it is a sow bug killer (what the hell is a sow bug and I HOPE to hell I don't have those, too) and they are harmless to humans, although the bite is described as "annoying". WTF?!? I'd be in therapy if this thing bit me, holy crap! Still shaking and squirming...